Water

Lily and I have been introducing Rowan to the Elements of Life, the principle substances that coalesce to bring into being the living cosmos, the four states of matter/energy of which the world is composed, and which we as Witches demarcate as Earth, Air, Fire, Water. A fifth substance is recognized, Aether, which is the underlying energy which takes on these states to manifest.

Each of the Elements works as a symbol, representing a variety of qualities and energies. To quote Gabriel Carrillo: "When we speak about Fire, Water, Air and Earth, we are not speaking about the composition of chemicals, but of how our inner self understands the psychic qualities of the Elements. The Elements are used in magic to create alchemical changes produced by studying, defining, comprehending and embodying them. Clarifying and balancing the Elements internally transforms and greatly enlarges our sense of awareness of ourselves and of the world around us."

This week I have been focusing on Water, which is the liquid state of matter and whose power is Fluidity. In the body, Water manifests in the lymphatic and circulatory systems, and in the mind it manifests as adaptability. These heady associative principles are not something Rowan is going to understand right now, and I needed to appeal to his Fetch, or animal-soul, using touch.

I decided that introducing him to Water in the shower would be the best bet -- it's about the only time he really interacts directly with that Element. I often have Lily hand him to me when I'm in the shower so I can give him a good wash, since he hates baths. I usually spritz him with water quickly and then use a washcloth with baby shampoo on it to scrub him gently, then rinse him off again quickly. But today we took our time.

When Lily passed him off, I put him under the showerstream and cradled him against me, so that it was running down the back of his head and making sure it wasn't spraying him in the face, which he clearly dislikes. I let the falling water create a little pool in the hallow of his body nestled up next to mine, and dipped his hands in it, then lifted a small amount in my palm to trickle down his front. He liked it and laughed, so we did that game a few times.

Then I began rocking him while the water was running over us, and I began to invoke the Element of Water, "seeing" the water from the showerstream begin to glow a soft blue, (its principle color association), falling down over us, cleansing us.

Water is very much associated with cleansing and purity in Feri, mainly in a ritual we call Kala, a water rite that unbinds knoted up power within our energy bodies and physical form. A ritual bath is very much the same thing as Kala.

I began to sing a chant that the spirits gave me some years ago:

Mama wash over me, Mama wash over me;
White waves cresting, in the deep blue sea,
breaking over my beautiful body,
Mama wash me clean.

He liked the song, and began to vocalize softly and smile while I was singing it. I then thanked the spirits of Water, and as I was doing so, I could feel Rowan's emotional centers begin to get a little intense, and he began swinging back and forth between laughing and fussing.

It was time to pass him back to Mommy. When we did the handoff, he began to cry, and Lily took him in a towel to dry him off, get him grounded again, and centered.

It was a good adventure, a good introduction to an element that is very "shifty," but next time I'll make sure I have some better grounding going on.

It will be great to see how he develops as a little Witchboy, having a clear relationships with the Elements and the spirits associated with them. So precious!

Io Evhoe!

Returning to the Blogosphere

So here I am, a proud new papa. Rowan's six months old now, and I've decided to return from a blogging hiatus.

It's been quite the transition, though nothing we could have really prepared for. Rowan changes weekly now -- preferences, routines, mood. He's mostly a mellow baby, though he does have his daily meltdowns around napping and sleep -- he's super hard to get down for nap or bedtime.

I've been busy with work, both as the Squawk sitter and doing Bear-Oh! (Tarot) readings at bear events in the City and the East Bay, and am making some good money at it. We're also working hard on an event at Wolf Creek that has been my dream for some time -- the F(a)eri(e) Magick Gathering (www.lilyshahar.com/fmi). I'm really hoping it will come together and happen in the right way, Gods willing.

I've found that I have a lot of sexual currency in the bear/chub community, something that both amuses and delights me, and it's been quite nice, and has really helped my self-esteem. I'm trying hard not to give a shit, though, about that opiate known as external validation, which has been one of my most baneful demons.

I've been making some new friends, people who are more like myself, who care and are shining lights in the darkness for so many lost souls. They are verily Bad Ass.

I feel like there's so much that's happened, I'll never be able to blog about it all. I've yet again become another person, a still more true version of myself. I've been embodying what it means to be a "responsible adult," as Corby from our birth class put it awesomely: "I think a big part of becoming a parent is letting go of self absorption and selfishness and allowing someone else to have it." Parenting is, in many way, about sacrifice -- giving up those little things for the bigger, whole vision, and making it holy.

I value the time I have to myself, which is precious and little, and I try not to waste any of it anymore. Suffice to say I don't get bored and I choose who I spend it with very carefully.

I am so in love with my son, he's so amazing and smart and adorable. I could never have imagined how deeply I could love someone, and with such an almost instant bond.

In the next few days, I'll be doing a guest blog on Lily's Witch Mom (www.parentingbythelightofthemoon.blogspot.com), about introducing Rowan to the element of Water -- in the shower!

Until then!